Coaching to Overcome Limiting Beliefs: Helping Leaders Get Unstuck
Many leaders feel stuck - not because they lack skills or drive, but because of limiting beliefs they’ve internalised over time. These beliefs shape how we see ourselves and what we believe is possible. As a leadership coach, I’ve seen firsthand how powerful it can be when clients begin to challenge the stories they’ve been telling themselves.
In this post, I’ll share what limiting beliefs often sound like, where they come from, and how coaching can help shift them - using tools like Byron Katie’s Four Questions.
What Are Limiting Beliefs in Leadership?
Limiting beliefs are assumptions we accept as facts - often unconsciously. They can come from childhood, past experiences, workplace cultures, or even feedback we’ve misinterpreted. In leadership contexts, they often sound like:
“I’m not strategic.”
“I avoid conflict.”
“I always have to get it right.”
“If I don’t have the answer, I’ll lose credibility.”
These beliefs shape our behaviours, choices, and self-image — sometimes for years. They quietly narrow our thinking and stop us from stepping into the full range of leadership we’re capable of.
I experienced this firsthand myself, when a senior leader once gave me “feedback” that I was too much in the background, and that by encouraging my team to take the public lead on their pieces of work, I failed to create a strong “brand” as a leader. I took this to heart and tried to change who I was - to very little success. Over time what I came to realise was this feedback was based on their beliefs of what made a “good leader” - not rooted in what made me authentic and comfortable in my own skin. I got good results out of people by showing belief in them, not by taking public credit for their work…
How Coaching Helps Leaders Identify What’s Holding Them Back
In my coaching work, I’ve found that progress often begins with curiosity. When clients describe their challenges, I pay close attention to the language they use - not just what they say, but how they say it.
Beneath the surface is usually a story they’re telling themselves about who they are. Coaching gives us the space to ask:
Where did this belief come from?
Is it based on fact, or an experience that shaped a narrative?
Is it still serving you?
This process helps clients reclaim choice. Instead of being driven by an unconscious script, they begin to see new ways forward.
Byron Katie’s Four Questions: A Tool for Reframing Beliefs
One framework I recently discovered that I want to use more with clients is Byron Katie’s Four Questions - a simple but transformative set of prompts that invite reflection:
Is it true?
Can you absolutely know that it’s true?
What happens when you believe that thought?
Who would you be without it?
These questions help shift beliefs from fixed truths to flexible perspectives. They create breathing room for growth.
Staying Aware of Coaching Biases
As coaches, it’s critical to stay aware of our own inner narratives, too. When we listen to others, we risk filtering their experience through our own beliefs - whether limiting or enabling.
That’s why one of my coaching principles is to stay curious and grounded. To listen deeply and check my interpretations, so the coaching conversation stays fully centred on their story - not mine.
From Limiting Scripts to Future Plans
Ultimately, leadership coaching isn’t about fixing people. It’s about helping them surface what they may not yet see - and supporting them in writing a new, more empowering script.
Questions I often ask include:
What might you be overlooking about yourself?
What strengths are you discounting?
What story would serve you better in this next chapter?
When we challenge limiting beliefs with compassion and clarity, we create space for something better: a more expansive, courageous version of who we could become.
Ready to Get Unstuck? Let’s Talk
If you’re a leader feeling held back by an inner script that no longer serves you, coaching can help.
Click Get in Touch on my website to start a conversation.
